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Sexuality, gender and Inclusivity

Angie Gunn

A matching game including words and phrases to increase understanding of sexuality related terms

ABDL  To recognize one’s sexual orientation, gender identity, or sex identity, and to be open about it with oneself and with others.
Ally  Sex change operation.
Androgynous  Keeping one’s sexual orientation and/or gender or sex identity a secret.
Asexual  The practice of having multiple open, honest love relationships.
BDSM  Adult baby diaper lovers, individuals who engage in consensual sexual or emotional play with another while role playing child like themes
Bias  refers to the chromosomal endowment of the individual, with emphasis on the sex chromosomes (XX in women and XY in men).
Bigendered  1) A socially constructed system of classification that ascribes qualities of masculinity and femininity to people. Gender characteristics can change over time and are different between cultures. Words that refer to gender include: man, woman, transgender, masculine, feminine, and gender queer. 2) One’s sense of self as masculine or feminine regardless of external genitalia. 3) Refers to the way we perceive certain things to be masculine or feminine. These things need not be human; for example, in the language of many cultures, cups are feminine, and pencils masculine. [Traditionally, we tend to associate gender – that is, masculine and feminine meanings – with features that include: · physical sex or genitals; · other physical features (for example height, weight, and body hair); · sexual orientation (gay men are often considered more feminine than their heterosexual counterparts, and lesbian women more masculine); and · behavior or dress (a man who cries may be considered unmanly, a woman who is aggressive or wears a suit-coat and slacks may be considered unfeminine).]
Biphobia  Someone involved in what others consider deviant sexual practices. An umbrella term for BDSM or fetish play.
Bisexual  A transsexual who has had their sex change operation and now has the physical anatomy which mimics that of the sex they have transitioned to.
Coming out  A sexual practice involving a male partner observing a female partner have sex with another man (called a bull), usually a stranger of a more dominant persona
Cuckold  1) An umbrella term used to refer to all LGBTIQ people. 2) A political statement, as well as a sexual orientation, which advocates breaking binary thinking and seeing both sexual 14 orientation and gender identity as potentially fluid. 3) A simple label to explain a complex set of sexual behaviors and desires. For example, a person who is attracted to multiple genders may identify as queer. Many older LGBT people feel the word has been hatefully used against them for too long and are reluctant to embrace it. 4) Originally a synonym for “odd”, this word became a derogatory expression for gays in the 20th Century. Even though many people still use “queer” as an anti-gay epithet, a movement emerged in the 1980s that calls itself queer. Used in this way, queer means sexually dissident, but not necessarily gay. Many gays, transsexuals, bisexuals and even heterosexuals whose sexuality doesn’t fit into the cultural standard of monogamous heterosexual marriage have adopted the “queer” label. In academic circles, the term “queer” often refers to the approaches and sensibilities of queer theory.
Domestic Partner  Male to Female (transvestite or transsexual).
Dominant culture  A transsexual who has not yet had their sex change operation(s) but who ‘plans on having it/them.
Drab  1) “Gender identity” refers to an individual’s self-awareness or fundamental sense of themselves as being masculine or feminine, and male or female. The phrase “gender identity” originated as a psychiatric term, and is commonly used to protect transsexual or transgender employees, particularly those who transition from one sex to another on the job. 2) The gender that a person sees oneself as. This can include refusing to label oneself with a gender. Gender identity is also often conflated with sexual orientation, but this is inaccurate. Gender identity does not cause sexual orientation. For example, a masculine woman is not necessarily a lesbian.
Fetishist  Prejudice; an inclination or preference, especially one that interferes with impartial judgment.
FTM  A person who redefines or plays with gender, or who refuses gender altogether. A label for people who bend/break the rules of gender and blur the boundaries.
Gay  Arrangement of a society used to benefit one group at the expense of another through the use of language, media education, religion, economics, etc.
Gender  Refers to gender expression and the process of reflecting ones gender to others; someone who is bigendered may present as female one day and male the next.
Gender Binary System  Having no evident sex or sex organs. In usage, may refer to a person who is not sexually active, or not sexually attracted to other people.
Gender Conformity  The process by which an oppressed person comes to believe, accept, or live out the inaccurate stereotypes and misinformation about their group.
Gender Expression/Gender Image  A person who is fluid in sexual orientation and/or gender or sex identity.
Gender Identity  A woman attracted to women.
Genderism  female-to-male (transvestite or transsexual).
Gender-neutral  Assuming every person to be heterosexual therefore marginalizing persons who do not identify as heterosexual. It is also believing heterosexuality to be superior to homosexuality and all other sexual orientations.
Gender Queer (or Genderqueer)  Excluded, ignored, or relegated to the outer edge of a group/society/community.
Genetic  Men attracted to men. Colloquially used as an umbrella term to include all LGBTIQ people.
Heterosexism  The sex that a person sees themselves as. This can include refusing to label oneself with a sex.
Homophobia  Refers to varying degrees of being open about one’s sexual orientation and/or sex identity or gender identity.
Homosexuality  Someone who reflects an appearance that is both masculine and feminine, or who appears to be neither or both a boy and a girl.
Institutional Oppression  The cultural values, beliefs, and practices that are assumed to be the most common and influential within a given society.
Internalized Oppression  Holding people to traditional expectations based on gender, or punishing or excluding those who don’t conform to traditional gender expectations.
Intersex  A male-to-female transition (MTF). [The medical literature tends to use the extremely demeaning term “male transsexual” to mean the same thing. Note that you can tell the preferred form is in use when the gender word comes after the “T” word.]
In the closet  When a FTM takes the hormone testosterone.
Kinky  Someone who idenitifes as sexually aroused to an large degree by a particular object, item of clothing, part of the body, etc
Lesbian  When your gender identity and sex “match” (i.e. fit social norms). For example, a male who is masculine and identifies as a man.
LGBTIQ  Nondiscriminatory language to describe relationships—e.g. “spouse” and “partner” are gender-neutral alternatives to the gender-specific words “husband,” “wife,” “boyfriend” and “girlfriend.”
Marginalized  A female-to-male transition (FTM). [The medical literature tends to use the extremely demeaning term “female transsexual” to mean the same thing. Note that you can tell the preferred form is in use when the gender word comes after the “T” word.]
Men who have sex with men (MSM)  The irrational fear and intolerance of people who are bisexual.
MTF  Refers to the process of people choosing with which identifying terms/groups they identify. (E.g. Someone could self-identify as male, female or bigendered, multi-racial, etc.)
Mononormative  Men who engage in same-sex behavior, but who may not necessarily self-identify as gay.
Non-Op  Means dressing as a boy, referring to men’s clothes or wearing men’s clothes; is used mainly by gender benders and cross-dressers of both directions. Drag: The act of dressing in gendered clothing as part of a performance. Drag Queens perform in highly feminine attire. Drag Kings perform in highly masculine attire. Drag may be performed as a political comment on gender, as parody, or simply as entertainment. Drag performance does not indicate sexuality, gender identity, or sex identity.
On T  A system of oppression that requires everyone to be raised either male or female, and masculine or feminine. Eliminates 5 the possibility for other gender expressions, and gives power to people whose genders do not break gender norms at the expense of transgender and intersex people. Manifests itself as transphobia.
Out or Out of the closet  The way one presents oneself to the world, as either masculine or feminine, or both or neither. This can include dress, posture, vocal inflection, and other behavior.
Pansexual  One who lives with their beloved and/or is at least emotionally and financially connected in a supportive manner with another. Another word for spouse, lover, significant other, etc.
Pass  The deep-seated direction of one’s sexual (erotic) attraction. It is on a continuum and not a set of absolute categories, sometimes referred to as affection orientation or sexuality.
Polyamory  Bondage, Dominance, Submission, Sadism, Masochism, Master/ Slave, power and pain play which can happen during sex but also outside of sexual activity.
Post-Op  Someone who advocates for and supports members of a community other than their own. Reaching across differences to achieve mutual goals.
Present  Means to be in your preferred gender image and to be able to do so convincingly in the eyes of those around you, for example an FTM or cross dresser or drag king who looks like a man and not like a woman.
Pre-Op  The irrational fear and intolerance of people who are homosexual or of homosexual feelings within one’s self. This assumes that heterosexuality is superior.
Queer  1) Transgender (sometimes shortened to trans or TG) people are those whose psychological self (“gender identity”) differs from the social expectations for the physical sex they were born with. To understand this, one must understand the difference between biological sex, which is one’s body (genitals, chromosomes, ect.), and social gender, which refers to levels of masculinity and femininity. Often, society conflates sex and gender, viewing them as the same thing. But, gender and sex are not the same thing. Transgender people are those whose psychological self (“gender identity”) differs from the social expectations for the physical sex they were born with. For example, a female with a masculine gender identity or who identifies as a man. 2) An umbrella term for transsexuals, cross-dressers (transvestites), transgenderists, gender queers, and people who identify as neither female nor male and/or as neither a man or as a woman. Transgender is not a sexual orientation; transgender people may have any sexual orientation. It is important to acknowledge that while some people may fit under this definition of transgender, they may not identify as such.
Self-Identify  Also bi. A person who is attracted to two sexes or two genders, but not necessarily simultaneously or equally. [This used to be defined as a person who is attracted to both genders or both sexes, but since there are not only two sexes (see intersex and transsexual) and there are not only two genders (see transgender), this definition is inaccurate.]
Sex  Intersexuality is a set of medical conditions that feature congenital anomaly of the reproductive and sexual system. That is, intersex people are born with “sex chromosomes,” external genitalia, or internal reproductive systems that are not considered “standard” for either male or female. The existence of intersexuals shows that there are not just two 10 sexes and that our ways of thinking about sex (trying to force everyone to fit into either the male box or the female box) is socially constructed. About 1 in 2000 infants born are at risk for intersex genital mutilation. An even higher proportion of the population is intersex in some way. This word replaces “hermaphrodite”, which is generally considered impolite and/or derogatory.
Sex Identity  Person who is attracted to a gender other than their own. [Commonly thought of as “attraction to the opposite gender,” but since there are not only two genders (see transgender), this definition is inaccurate.]
Sex-Reassignment Surgery (SRS)  1) Refers to members of sexual orientations or who engage in sexual activities that are not part of the mainstream. 2) Refers to members of sex groups that do not fall into the majority categories of male or female, such as intersexuals and transsexuals.
Sexual minority  Refers to a person based on their anatomy (external genitalia, chromosomes, and internal reproductive system). Sex terms are male, female, transsexual, and intersex. Sex is biological, although social views and experiences of sex are cultural.
Sexual Orientation  Sexual, emotional, and/or romantic attraction to the same sex.
Straight  Refers to those who feel they have both a male and a female side to their personalities. Some “bigendered” people crossdress, others may eventually have a sex-change operation, others may do neither.
Trans Female/Woman  Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Intersex, Queer.
Transgender  the normalization of being attracted to only one gender…so much so that any deviation from that (i.e. bisexuality) is considered abnormal and abhorrent
Trans Man/Male  Refers to transsexuals who seek sex reassignment through hormones and who crosslive, but stop just short of surgery. Some have concerns about major surgery, which is not always successful, others are unable to pay for the expensive procedures surgery would entail, and still others feel that they are complete without the surgery.

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